Often times people ask me what I think is the most important mental skill. Some typical answers are “the one you need most”, or “all of them”, or “the one that is your biggest strength”. In other words….it depends!
But, I think what they are asking is what truly gives us the freedom to consistently perform at our best. In that case, this is my answer:
Knowing you are loved and valued no matter how you perform.
This may sound ironic and it is certainly not the vibe people get from society, but things based on Jesus are not of this world. When someone knows that they are valued regardless of how they perform they tend to recover more quickly, maintain self-confidence through highs and lows, externalize failure (“I failed on that task today” versus, “I’m a failure”), they tend to have less underlying toxic pressure even if it’s in their subconscious, and they tend to have a much better mental filter (see the Confidence LESSON for more about Mental Filter) which allows them to grow from their success and failure. Yes, this is coming from a woman who created a program designed to help you do great and mighty things! I do believe God wants that for us so that we can inspire others and glorify Him, but not so we can earn His value or love for us….it’s there no matter what.
It’s with no uncertainty in the bible that God tells us our primary value and identity is in Christ’s view of us.
For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39.
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even
the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. -Matthew
He saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of
regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit – Titus 3:5
So, anyone reading this must know that they are unconditionally loved and fully valued by God….no matter what! For leaders, I encourage you, as you motivate them to do great and mighty things, to also remind youth of this truth!
Dear God, I hope that whoever reads this gets a word or an idea that affirms their value in YOU. May they do great and mighty things to inspire others and to glorify you. Amen.