Millions are getting ill with this awful virus; some even dying, many of us are suffering financially and emotionally, many are trying to work from home and help our kids that aren’t in school, we don’t get to see friends and family like we want, racial injustice is being more exposed, places of worship and businesses are shutting down, we’re witnessing protests that turn violent and watching our Capital get stormed. As I write, I see myself in these words and feel the sadness of it all.
If I truly allow myself to feel the grief that I have it will probably really hurt so sometimes I get angry instead. Feeling sad makes us feel weak and vulnerable and anger makes us feel like we have some sense of control, it’s more actionable, so we chose anger. However, underneath it all is a deep sadness at what is going on around us.
Prior to this year I’ve been about a 1 on a 1-10 scale of political passion. Yet, this year I’ve found myself getting angry. Angry at politicians, angry at school boards, and angry at things that I don’t normally get angry about like the restaurant serving Pepsi instead of Coke. While I still count my blessings daily, I decided to dig a little deeper as to why I’m feeling this anger. I realized that I’m not angry, I am sad. I surrender, I am heart broken.
Some days I just feel like screaming at anybody, but I will tell you this: the days that I have gone into my closet and cried my eyes out instead have been the most rejuvenating to date. Please know, I’m not invalidating anyone’s anger. I’m just saying, next time you feel angry, stop and ask yourself if it’s really something you are sad about? See if that feels more authentic. And if so, let yourself feel sad and process through it.
Moving Forward: Why This Matters
In order for our country to heal most of us are probably going to need to grieve in some way or another; it is a part of the healing process. If our grief is disguised as anger, the healing can’t happen. So, let’s be kind, let’s forgive, let’s’ try to let go of the “us” vs. “them”. May we give and receive grace. May acknowledging our sadness open the gates of hope.
If this sadness becomes greater than you can deal with, there is help. Click HERE for a list of several free counseling services. You are valued.